I Remembered the Word Oscillation Today

6:07 p.m.

Sooo.

I broke down and bought a fan today. Because temps in the 90's with no fans = Kara gets a liiiiiittle cranky at night. Mostly because I prefer sleeping under several layers of blanket. Not on top of them, like some kind of ANIMAL. That's how the DOG sleeps on HIS bed. I'm not some sort of stinky, barking, shit-rolling, hyper-active Irish setter mix here.

I'm a girl.

It doesn't seem hot here, usually. I'd say our house is comfortable 95 percent of the time. But. I need to be burrowed when I sleep.

I could be wrong, but when I shell out good hard-earned cash for a fan, I shouldn't have to put the entire thing together myself. I'd be okay with...you know, putting the top on the stand. That's understandable. Save packaging material, etc. Although every piece was wrapped individually, increasing the annoying-plastic-bag contents of our garbage by at least 80 percent. (I'm a big fan of percentages today. They are probably completely inaccurate. Or at least 70 percent wrong. And I'm okay with that.) But the minute I have to go rooting around in the garage for various sized screwdrivers, is the minute I know the purchase has gone Horribly Wrong. In fact, any time I have to go to the garage for anything other than more Diet Cherry Coke means a situation has gone horribly wrong.

Yes, that is how I am.

Yes, I am okay with that.

And we didn't even have the size screwdriver I needed. Of course, we might. Justin was not here to pester about it. I just hope the whole top doesn't come tumbling apart mid-oscillation and behead a cat or something.

I'm sure it'll be fine.

I really hate putting things together. Crappy bookcases, Walmart filing cabinets, jigsaw puzzles. And fans.

Pathetically, it took me a confused and muttering-heavy half an hour to get the thing together. (This was mostly because a page was missing from the instruction booklet. At least, that is what I'm telling myself. Somehow it skipped half the instructions and went right to "Features" which included "Easy and fast assembly" and "Stylish and convenient pieces.") Combined with the fifteen minutes it took me to decide between this one and the one with the remote and the roughly twenty minutes it took me to get to the store and back, and the thirty minutes I was distracted in the store by non-fan categories of items...and the fifteen minutes I am spending blogging about it...that's a lot of time and effort! And I had to put the blades in! Myself!

Also, the fan is not "whisper quiet" as the box proudly boasts.

But it feels nice. Monk is passed out in front of it.

I think I'll be able to stand a sheet tonight. Let's hear it for burrowing. Burrowing!

Monk will continue to sleep on top of his bed, with no blankets whatsoever, because he is still an ANIMAL.

And a jerk.

Kisses,
black sheep