baa baa black sheep

6.27.2006

Spiderman Poem

8:48 p.m.

I should write a real post, but I'm exhausted and in the midst of the Great Parental Visit of 2006. So I'm going to share a breathtaking piece of poetry with you. I did not write it. It was written by a friend. Mike Bennett. Because I told him to. It is as follows:

Who am I?
I am Spider-Man.
Quoth Toby McGuire,
His voice cracking as though
Belonging to a 13 year old.

It was strange
Toby having those muscles
In the movie
Because
Ordinarily he is pretty skinny.

An interesting choice
Toby McGuire as a superhero.

The Theme of the film is,
If you want to call it that,
Where "it" could refer to "Theme" or "film",
"With Great Power,
"Comes Great Responsibility."

This speaks to us as Americans today
Who share Peter Parker's Guilt
At allowing our gentle Uncle Ben to be murdered
When we could have stopped the killer
Had he not been robbing someone who had pissed us off

In fact,
I would go as far as to say
This theme speaks to us as Human Beings
Who hold Dominion over all the animals and plants
As intended by the Lord God.

With great power
Comes great responsibility

Indeed

In the movie, there was
The much ballyhooed "upside-down kiss"
Unfortunately it was between
Toby McGuire
and
what's her fuck

Kirsten Dunst.
Who I suppose is cute
In a kind of annoyingly wholesome way
Although
wasn't she in that movie
where they all killed themselves
what was that movie
it wasn't very wholesome
but i don't think i liked it that much

The Virgin Suicides
Ah, Google
Like a superhero you rescue me
From the Darkness of my Ignorance

The Upside-Down Kiss

Once
At this party
I was falling asleep on the couch
Because
I was Drunk

Also
I was Bored

The Party was in New Jersey
And this girl
Leaned over my face from behind the couch and said
"HI!"
I said, Hmm?

"We could do the spiderman kiss!!"
This was because I was upside-down
Relative to her
And I was attractive
Relative to her

So I obliged because
Hey
What the hell
That was it though
She was not that attractive.

Also
Returning to the idea of a "spider-man"
I like the web shooting devices he made
That was a good idea
To go with his ability to climb walls.

I'm pretty happy to be partially responsible for this. After all, we did see it together a bazillion years ago.

More later, after the Visit ends.

Kisses,
black sheep

3 Comments:

Anonymous MFP said...

Tell Mike I think he's a genius... he made a piss poor day much more bearable ~ MFP

1:05 PM, June 28, 2006  
Anonymous Emily said...

I love your site, I love your art, I love the poem. And I'm not being overly loving or flamboyant. I read a few of your blogs, including the Fatty one. I'm impressed with your honesty on the subject, you look amazing in all of your pictures, and you're an inspiration to me. I was obese in mid-high school, and I lost weight in a moderately healthy way my last year and a half. College saw me up and down, and now I'm partly up but not as bad as I was. I try not to eat for emotional reasons, and I'm walking with a coworker at lunch everyday. Even did weights in my mom's basement while waiting on laundry. Peace to you!

7:47 AM, June 29, 2006  
Anonymous Jared said...

hey. Yeah, you! Call me!

11:53 PM, June 30, 2006  

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